Romance is a common phenomenon. But extramarital romance was not common in our part of (deshi) world. But nowadays there is an upward trend in extra marital relationship and deshi romance. Extramarital affairs are very common in western society where marriage may not a criterion for having physical relationship but in conservative societies in subcontinent, marriage is treated as precondition to have physical relationship.
Well, sex is depending on the choice of individual. If anyone thinks he is adult and can have a sexual relationship with his/her partners she/he can. But our society doesn't permit sex without marriage. But still adult people have their choice and they are entitled to practice their choice.
Why deshi people tend to extra marital relationship?
Answer is not that easy.
A married couple may not be happy in their conjugal life and so both of them or one of them may turn for affairs with someone else to have some fresh spice in life. If one person isn't sexually and emotionally satisfied with his/her legal partner she/he may tend to go for extra marital romance.
There is an unhealthy trend in our society that a couple who dated earlier might not marry in the end for various reasons. That couple may marry two different persons, but they still can maintain a relationship which is treated as extra marital.
It is a common perception that people hardly can forget their teenage time dates. So even after marriage they may not forget their ex dates and could maintain an emotional relationship.
In a conjugal life, sex is the main criterion to maintain happy life. If there is any deficiency of sex then partners may be tempted to turn for extra marital.
A relationship is build on mutual trust, affection and respect to each other. If there is any lack of trust then that relationship could be spoiled.
Ignoring partner can also cause extra marital romance. When a partner sees she/he is repeatedly ignored byher/his legal partner s/he may tend to a new relationship.
Extramarital relationship is the theme of movies, novels, TV serials etc. People can easily influenced by these trends of different media. If a person watch such type of things days after days, it can have big impact on that person especially teenagers' mind.
Some people may even tempt to maintain extramarital relationship for more adventure and extra spice in emotional life. But it is clearly against the very fundamental of healthy conjugal life.
Is extra marital romance suitable for our society?
Our conservative society is based on religious values, ethical values, moral values, harmony in society and tradition of our society. Our society and ethics don't allow us to maintain extramarital relationship when a legal relationship exists. People usually keep extra marital relationship secret. But you cannot keep it secret for good. Your partner may know about it at some stage.
Yes, some people even tend to live together without any legal bindings, that's different thing. Our society doesn't allow that as well. I think sexual relationship without marriage in our conservative society creates disharmony.
In western society, live together, extramarital relationship, sex before marriage is somehow acceptable. They never ask about the legality of their children but in our society children are always recognized by the name of their father. There is also a question of harmony within the family. So, for our conservative society extramarital relationship is not suitable.
Bottom Line:
A relationship is build on the choice of individual. We cannot interfere in their choice. But everyone has to show respect to the values of society, religion, tradition, harmony. A healthy relationship is a must for a healthy life. If your relationship is build on mutual trust and respect you can avoid such extramarital romance. Try to listen your partner and give due importance. You will be fine in all respects.
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